Taking Care of Yourself Physically and Mentally During a Divorce

 Posted on September 13, 2023 in Divorce

Getting a divorce is often considered one of the most stressful life events that a person can go through. Not only does the end of a marriage bring about significant emotional upheaval, but it can have physical effects on a person as well. If you are going through the divorce process, it is important to remember that during this challenging time, taking care of yourself both physically and mentally should be a priority. 

One of the best things you can do to ensure that you will be able to address your physical and emotional needs during your divorce is to hire a skilled family law attorney. With a legal advocate on your side to help you address the various aspects of the divorce process, you will be able to focus on meeting your needs. At Weiss-Kunz & Oliver, LLC, we work to ensure that our clients will be fully prepared to handle all of their legal concerns, and we fight to protect their rights at all times. When you work with us, you can rest assured that your case is in professional hands, and you can begin taking steps to make the necessary changes in your life while ensuring that you will be able to thrive in the future.

Here are some tips to help you navigate the divorce process:

1. Prioritize Self-Care

To maintain your overall well-being during and after your divorce, you will want to consider your ongoing needs, take steps to address your physical and mental health, and focus on what you can do to achieve success in the future. First of all, you will want to take steps to ensure you are meeting your basic physical needs. This includes getting adequate sleep, eating nutritious meals, and staying hydrated. Neglecting these issues may lead to problems such as low energy, decreased concentration and focus, increased irritability, and difficulty managing daily tasks. You need to be able to consider the legal and financial issues involved in your divorce while still managing daily responsibilities at work and at home. Taking care of yourself physically is essential for ensuring that you can do so.

While meeting your physical needs can create a good foundation for maintaining good overall health, it is also important to address the mental and emotional concerns that are affecting you. Your divorce is likely to evoke multiple strong emotions, which may include anger, sadness, worries about the future, anxiety about the outcome of your case, or guilt about how your children may be affected. Failure to fully consider these emotions and deal with them effectively can make it more difficult to move forward and establish a new life for yourself. You may also find it harder to resolve disputes with your spouse and reach agreements on divorce-related issues. 

As you work to address the emotional concerns that are affecting you during your divorce, you can:

Give Yourself Permission to Grieve

It can be helpful to acknowledge that going through a divorce is a significant loss. You may have to let go of your plans for the future and your expectations for how you thought the rest of your life would turn out. Depending on how child custody issues are handled, you may have to adjust to spending less time with your children. You may even have to give up aspects of your identity that were tied to your marriage. It is important to give yourself space and time to process these emotions. This can help you begin to heal and take steps to establish new goals and expectations for the rest of your life.

Practice Mindfulness and Stress-Reducing Techniques

Dealing with the strong emotions you may experience during your divorce may not be easy, and you may also be struggling with stress and anxiety about the legal issues you will need to address and the financial concerns that will affect you. Mindfulness techniques such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or yoga can help reduce stress levels and promote mental well-being during this difficult time. These practices can help you focus on the present moment and cultivate a sense of calm amidst the chaos. You can also make time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation, and getting regular exercise can be an especially effective way of boosting your mood and improving your overall energy levels.

Take Breaks From Legal Proceedings

Addressing the legal aspects of your divorce can seem overwhelming. As you determine how to handle issues related to property division, you may spend a great deal of time listing and evaluating the physical items and financial assets you own and making decisions about what is important for you to keep and how you can provide for your needs in the future. You may also spend time and energy determining how to address child-related issues, including establishing parenting time schedules that will allow you to maintain good relationships with your children. 

In a complex divorce, the issues you may need to address can seem endless, and you may struggle to get a handle on everything that will need to be decided before your marriage can be legally dissolved. However, as you work to address all of these concerns, it is important to make sure they do not consume every aspect of your life. Taking regular breaks from attempting to address and resolve your legal issues allows you time to recharge and regain perspective. Putting your time and energy toward other pursuits that are important to you, such as participating in hobbies or spending time with your children, can help you make sure you will be prepared for success in your post-divorce life.

2. Seek Support

Nobody should have to go through difficult situations alone. A strong support system can provide immense comfort during trying times. Regardless of your situation, you always have options for connecting with others and receiving the help and support you need. You can lean on your existing relationships or begin building a new support system as you establish a post-divorce life. This may include:

Connect With Friends and Family Members

Those who know you best can provide invaluable support as you work through the emotional issues and changes you are experiencing during your divorce. Spending time with people who care about you can provide you with immense benefits, even if you do not discuss divorce-related issues with them. Your loved ones can offer understanding and encouragement, and they can be there for you when you need comfort or companionship.

Join a Support Group

Meeting together with others who are going through similar experiences can be a great way to provide some perspective and discuss the issues you may encounter. You may be able to discuss the best ways to approach legal issues and resolve disputes, or you may focus on addressing the emotions you are feeling and developing strategies to manage your mental health. This can help you understand that you are not alone and that many other people are dealing with similar issues, and it can give you ideas for how to resolve the concerns you are facing and determine how you can move forward as you separate from your spouse and establish a new life for yourself.

Seek Professional Help When Needed

Whether you feel like you can get a handle on your emotional concerns or are worried that feelings of sadness or anxiety may become unmanageable, therapy or counseling services can be very beneficial. A mental health professional can guidance, support, and coping strategies specific to your situation, helping you determine the best ways to work through your emotions and maintain emotional stability as much as possible. They may also be able to help you determine the best ways to approach disagreements with your spouse and resolve conflicts during your divorce, and they can offer guidance on parenting concerns, ensuring that you will be able to provide love and support for your children and help them get through this difficult time.

3. Practice Effective Communication Skills

Being able to discuss divorce-related issues with your spouse and reach agreements on how various issues will be resolved can help you get through the divorce process more easily and efficiently. Maintaining open lines of communication can be essential as you deal with the many legal, financial, and practical matters involved in the end of your marriage. You want to make sure you will be able to express your needs and concerns effectively as you work to make decisions about the terms of your divorce settlement. 

Unfortunately, holding productive discussions can be difficult when your marriage has broken down. Due to the conflict between the two of you and the strong emotions involved in your divorce, it is all too easy for discussions to break down into arguments. This can lead to an escalation of conflict, making disputes even more difficult to resolve and potentially leading to a protracted divorce process and increased expenses.

As you work to negotiate a settlement in your divorce, you can work to maintain effective communication by doing the following:

Establish Healthy Boundaries

Setting boundaries with your soon-to-be ex-spouse during the divorce process can protect your emotional well-being and help you avoid arguments and conflict. You can clearly define what behaviors are acceptable or not acceptable when communicating or interacting with each other. You can also identify topics that are off-limits, such as the reasons for the end of your marriage or arguments you have had in the past. This can protect you from re-experiencing emotional trauma, and it can make sure your discussions will be productive.

Stay Calm and Focused

To be able to resolve the outstanding issues in your divorce, you need to be able to focus on identifying these concerns and working to reach agreements. If it seems like discussions may lead to conflict, you may want to take a break so that you can collect yourself, calm down, and refocus on finding productive solutions rather than attempting to win arguments. By keeping your goals in mind, you can do your best to reach workable agreements that will fully address the legal aspects of your divorce.

Consider Working With a Therapist or Counselor

Since your relationship with your spouse is ending, it may seem counterintuitive to seek professional help from someone who assists with family relationships. However, doing so can help you establish positive methods of communication, ensuring that the two of you will be able to work together to resolve the issues in your case. A therapist may be able to help you see things from each other’s perspective, giving you a better understanding of what is important to each of you and how you reach agreements and resolve conflicts. 

Family therapy can be especially helpful if you will be sharing custody of your children with your ex-spouse. Even though the two of you will no longer be married, you will still need to work together to co-parent your children, and this will require you to discuss child-related issues and make decisions about multiple aspects of your children’s lives. By establishing a solid foundation for how you will communicate with each other and cooperate to make decisions, you can avoid conflict in the years to come and focus on how you can provide for your children’s best interests.

Consider Divorce Mediation

Resolving the many legal issues involved in your divorce can be a complex matter, but you may be able to make this process easier by working with a neutral mediator. During mediation, you and your spouse will work together to reach agreements on the terms of your divorce settlement, and the mediator can help facilitate discussions and offer guidance on what legal issues will need to be addressed and resolved. This can often make the divorce process faster, easier, and more efficient.

Contact Our DuPage County Divorce Lawyers

As you focus on managing your well-being and moving forward to a better future after your divorce, you will need a lawyer who can help you address the legal aspects of your case, protect your rights, and make sure you take the correct steps to achieve your goals. At Weiss-Kunz & Oliver, LLC, our skilled Elmhurst divorce attorneys can guide you through the legal process and make sure you will be able to complete your divorce successfully. By entrusting the legal aspects of your divorce with us, you can alleviate some stress and focus on self-care. To get the support you need, call us at 312-605-4041 and set up a consultation.